Feelings of inadequacy come during different seasons of life and can be caused by various circumstances. For a woman, not getting pregnant definitely can be one of those circumstances that causes feelings of inadequacy to arise. Being able to carry and deliver a baby is part of makes us women, right? So what happens when that doesn’t happen the way we think it’s supposed to? We start to doubt ourselves. We start to question everything in our lives. We even question God. It shouldn’t be that way. So many other things make us who we are. We as women have so many awesome roles and having children is just a small part of the pie.
For me, it came down to this. My worth isn’t in becoming pregnant. Or any of these things I tend to focus on. I’m worth so much more than my circumstances. My worth comes from the Lord and I must be reminded of this constantly. I can’t desire anything more than I desire the Lord and that includes becoming pregnant. I can’t allow myself to become so consumed with having a baby that I forget those things that are really important. I think the lesson here is simple: Don’t desire anything more than you desire the Lord because once you do, that one “thing” has the potential to become an idol.
Whom have I in heaven but you?
And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
Psalm 73:25 (NIV)
Kristen D. Johnson