I’ve really been trying to shift my focus and think about something other than becoming pregnant lately. I’m really excited about becoming a doula and figuring out what that looks like for me. Being able to serve others but especially pregnant women is so amazing to me. I can’t wait until I can really dive in. In the back of my mind though I find myself thinking about when I become pregnant. How I will do things, what I will buy, what my birth plan will be like, etc. The books I’m currently reading are books that pregnant women would be reading so that makes for interesting thoughts. As the days go on, I realize just how consumed I am with trying to conceive. Shifting focus will help me take my eyes off of myself and my problems.
I still take all of my vitamins and supplements and my husband does the same. We’re just trying not to focus so much on actually becoming pregnant. I can’t tell you how many people have told us “once you stop thinking about it, it will happen”. Not sure exactly HOW to stop thinking about it completely, but we’re working on not thinking about it so much. We want to make sure we’re still enjoying our lives and the child we DO have. There is so much more to life and I think sometimes when you get so caught up in what you don’t have, you forget to be grateful for what you DO have. God has blessed us with so much and one of his greatest blessings has been this awesome marriage that we have. Despite how difficult things have been lately, we still enjoy one another, we enjoy our sex life and we want to make sure we keep it that way.
We never want becoming pregnant to be such a task that it begins to cause problems in our marriage. Our marriage comes first in life and we must remember that. I’m thankful that we are aware and make a conscious effort to preserve it. I pray that other couples who may be suffering from infertility take the time to remember what’s really important. Enjoy one another throughout this journey. Be thankful that you have each other. Let nothing come between your marriage.
“But at the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female. 7 ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, 8 and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh. 9 Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” (Mark 10:6-9 NIV)
Kristen D. Johnson