So after the first month of not getting pregnant, I started trying to keep up with everything! This is the beginning of my fertility obsession! I wanted all of my ducks to be in a row. I started researching different supplements just to see what I could possibly use to increase my chances of becoming pregnant. I soon found out that there were TONS of supplements for fertility. Whole Foods Market had supplements, so did GNC and the Vitamin Shoppe. I soon ran across something called FertileAid and it sounded pretty interesting. I decided that I would order it and give it a shot…I mean what did I have to lose? A couple of bucks? I felt that these supplements had all natural ingredients. These are ingredients that God placed on this earth for us to use so why not give it a shot?
After reading hundreds of reviews, I decided to order FertileAid. No, I take that back, I started by ordering Fertile CM which is actually a supplement that’s used to increase cervical mucus. Apparently, you need an abundance of cervical mucus to increase your chances of becoming pregnant (something else I didn’t know until I adopted this new obsession).
I also signed up for ALL of the apps that help you keep track of your cycle. I mean I have a pretty regular cycle so it was never hard to keep up with but now that we were trying to get pregnant, keeping up with my cycle became imperative. These apps have you chart EVERYTHING like the consistency of your cervical mucus, any symptoms you may have, ect. Keeping up with symptoms is an AWFUL idea!! See, when you’re trying to get pregnant, symptoms that could seem like pregnancy symptoms could actually be PMS symptoms. So you begin this vicious cycle of convincing yourself that you’re pregnant, only to learn that those symptoms were PMS symptoms. God whispered to me EVERYDAY “trust me and my timing” and I said “okay, sure God…I trust you”, yet my actions would always prove differently.
Oftentimes, trusting God is the HARDEST thing we have to do. It means that we have to stop trying to control everything and rest in his promises. There are so many promises in the bible about trusting God’s timing because his timing is perfect. For example, Isaiah 40:31 says “But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.” In other words, as I wait patiently for the Lord to fulfill his promises and show me his will for my life, he will continue to strengthen me. That’s definitely reassuring and something that I must remind myself of daily…
Kristen D. Johnson
